Tea and Sex

I’m a tea fetishist. That doesn’t really mean that I get turned on by drinking tea or that was what I used to think.

I was born in the U.K. and tea was never seen as being sexy. My idea of tea fetishism is based on the rituals around drinking it in public and the tense formality of tea-time. All of the habits associated with this strange custom, like poking your little finger out when you raise the cup to your lips, turn me on in different ways.

I prefer green tea and I’ve never got any other type in the house. I was surprised and amused recently when I read a report that green tea can do some wonderful things to your sex life. I’d already suspected it but it’s always reassuring to know that I’m right. According to the study the use of green tea over a 10 week period can improve your stamina by as much as 24%.

The University of Washington collected data on 6 different couples. Fifty percent had been offered green tea. The others had not. After the ten weeks were up, the couples who only drank green tea reported back that it had dramatically affected their sex life. As well as being happier and more relaxed they confirmed that they had sex more often and for longer than they’d done for a long time. A direct link between the tea and fertility was outside the scope of the study but it seems that its ability to promote a feeling of tranquility was the key.

Maybe this explains why, after I’ve had my pot of green tea in the morning, I need to lie down with my rabbit. It wasn’t my big sex drive at all, just the tea.

I was only too happy to shoot this set on a convenient balcony. Not only was I able to drink green tea while I posed but I was able to coordinate my beloved gingham blouse with a retro head scarf and glasses. Trying to navigate the teacup to my lipsticked pout with colour matched leather gloves was harder than it looks here.

Boy George once said : “I’d rather have a cup of tea than go to bed with someone – any day.” I prefer to have both and as often as I can.

I did have a lot more to say on this subject but I have to go.

The kettle just boiled and I’m thirsty.

Photography by Guy Moberly.

22 thoughts on “Tea and Sex”

    1. If only you would visit my offices in London and wheel a squeaky trolley between departments. You would be dressed like this when you serve the tea. Then you would cut cake and make a mess on your gingham as you plate up and smile.

  1. Channelling Hilda Ogden might seem an odd fetish choice but in your gloved hands it makes perfect sense.

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