Sheets of San Francisco – Fluidproof Bed Sheets – Review

Sheets of San Francisco – Fluidproof Bed Sheets – Review

I remember when I received a couples tantric massage a year ago. I went along to the session with a male friend who practises Tantra. Although there was nothing going on between us. I knew, nonetheless, that he would be the perfect candidate to share such an intensely sensual experience without it getting weird between us. The female nude masseuse was going to get to work on both of us. First of all, I lay down and received a thorough and invigorating massage from four expert hands – my friend and the masseuse. After that, I would be participating in a dual massage of my male friend.

He lay face down, as the naked masseuse and myself knelt either side of him and got to work. I took great pains to study everything she did before I duplicated her technique; there were multiple caresses and abundant splashes of oil involved. It took no time at all for us to become ridiculously messy as we touched and rubbed our bodies together. I took note of all the special tips and tricks that she shared with me and I imagined using them in my future conquests.

That was twelve months ago and ever since then I’ve gone through countless jars of coconut oil in an attempt to relive that experience, but sans the masseur and with a different guy of course. My current squeeze is also into massage, big time. During our protracted foreplay sessions, we enjoy full-body coconut oil massages; both giving and receiving them. I’m also extremely passionate about using lubricant to masturbate my partner, I never ever use lubricant on myself, thanks to the high quality and abundance of my own Venusian nectar.
sheets of san francisco, fluidproof sheets, sheets, venusohara,, Sploshing, sex toy review, couplesWhen I received these fluidproof sheets from the Sheets of San Francisco, I immediately thought about how it might enhance my massage/foreplay sessions. I’ve never once had to lie in a wet patch as I’m religious about the use of condoms. Religion and condoms don’t usually belong in the same sentence, of course, but I do like to get messy.

I even used to get a thrill from a bit of light ‘sploshing’. But, ever since I’ve turned vegan, the thought of animal products coming into contact with my naked skin is the very opposite of orgasmic. Vegan ‘sploshing’ could be a viable prospect one day, I hope. I must confess that it doesn’t feature prominently on my ‘bucket list’ of fantasies that I want to translate into reality, though.

I much prefer sliding my naked breasts against the naked torso of my partner and indulging in sensual, tantric, sex that can go on for hours. I visualise copious quantities of glossy oil, with slick, glistening, naked bodies sliding and gliding against each other again and again. We would use more than our hands, breasts, buttocks, elbows and genitalia. That thought is more than enough to make me want to mess up my sheets.

‘I need you to help me test some new sheets’ , I explained on the phone to my beau.

He was only too happy to oblige and we arranged a date and a time.


Sheets of San Francisco is a US brand that produces fluid-proof, rubber-feel, fitted bedsheets. They are high-quality, tough and  tactile, This bed-sheet is designed to protect your mattress from all the rough and tumble associated with your bedroom fun.

They are:

– Fluidproof.

– Breathable.

– Tactile.

– Machine Washable.

– Seam Free top surface.

. Made in the US.

Have your fun, then put it in the wash and you’re ready to go again in no time.

2-ply, engineered, rubber-feel, polyurethane fabric.

Fitted sheet with 10″ pocket. Other depths available to special order.

I tried a black one.

sheets of san francisco, fluidproof sheets, sheets, venusohara,, Sploshing, sex toy review, couples
USABILITY:  Very simple to use. Put them on your bed just like any other sheet and then prepare to get messy, I made sure my coconut oil and lubricant were close at hand to make sure that we could really make a mess. I started off by receiving a full body massage with more oil than usual. Knowing that I was testing a fluid-proof sheet just made me want to get even messier than usual. I wasn’t interested in sex. I just wanted to writhe around in oil and rub myself up against my lover.

After messy mutual masturbation –  and a variety of other fluids to add to the mix – we got up and had a shower. I put the sheet in the washing machine and it came out like nothing scandalous had ever happened on it.

You can also use it on the floor. It can also be a good idea to use for period sex. I believe that an orgasm is one of the best, and most natural, remedies for menstrual cramps. Besides, there are many women who experience an increase in libido at this time of the month and these sheets mean that you can prevent your towels from getting stained.

They are also ideal for women who squirt.
sheets of san francisco, fluidproof sheets, sheets, venusohara,, Sploshing, sex toy review, couples
PROS: You can get really messy. Pleasant satin-like texture against the skin is reminiscent of rubber. Comfortable in both warm and cool temperatures. Easy to wash. Highly practical.

CONS: Not cheap. But, if you’re really into messy sex, then they are absolutely essential.


– Wet and Messy / Sploshing enthusiasts.

– Massage fans.

– Women who squirt.

– Period sex.

Get your very own fluid proof sheets from Sheets of San Francisco here.

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