When I saw Uberrime dildos on social media, I was in awe of how strikingly beautiful they were. I must admit that I usually find the majority of realistic dildos come off as quite vulgar and lewd but the celebration of colours in these dildos makes them seem beautiful, fascinating and collectable.
A dildo is a solid and substantial erotic toy with a traditionally phallic form that does not vibrate. A dildo is not just for penetration, however. They are also ideal for tickling sensitive parts of the body and for external stimulation of the clitoris.
So, this is what Freud meant by ‘penis envy’, I thought to myself as I adjusted the angle of the strap-on dildo. I was wearing a cute set of lingerie and I was about to participate in an indoor photo shoot. It was my intention that the resulting photos would be perfect to illustrate the LGBT section of my book English for Perverts that was published a few years ago.
If you rearrange the word dildo, you end up with dodil. The dodil is a dildo that you can reshape according to your own preferences.
I have been exploring what it really means to be a minimalist in my day-to-day life. This has resulted in my decision to throw out anything that does not earn its place by bringing me continual joy. My main inspiration in this has been Marie Kondo’s book. Since reading it, I have been careful not to acquire anything new that I do not really need. I have donated books to a library, taken old clothes to a charity shop and made gifts of my furniture to neighbours. The process has been wonderfully liberating.
Teatime with porcelain dildos instead of scones
In the UK if you have a problem, a cup of tea will almost certainly be part of the solution. In fact, when presented with a problem, the first response is most likely to be: ‘let me put the kettle on’. Tea and sympathy makes everything seem better again. And now – with these special teatime porcelain dildos – I think I’m going to enjoy this ritual more than ever.
They say that it’s the thought that counts. This is especially true when it comes to erotic gifts. The thought process behind choosing the ideal erotic gift is often more elaborate and stimulating than for conventional presents. Erotic shopping doesn’t just spark imagination and desire. It also promotes greater complicity and intimacy as the purchase can often be enjoyed by the two of you. You can’t say the same about a piece of jewellery or a bunch of flowers.
There’s nothing quite like feeling like a virgin all over again. This is especially true if you’re a sex toy tester. Although I consider myself to be experienced, wise and well-informed when it comes to sex, I still love it when I get the chance to discover something new. Something that provokes that thrilling yet nerve-wracking first-timer energy within me.